Manners

We went to the YWCA for Water Aerobics class the other day. As we were going through the gate I noticed a young laddy that is taking the class for her prenatal exercises. I held the gate open as she went through without any response from her. She was followed by another lady who was from a previous generation and she said "Thank You" as she passed through. I was bothered that the first young lady did not acknowledge my gesture. Then I got to wondering "why should I be expecting anything in return?" I did something nice so what should I be expecting, a pat on the back? Isn't it enough that I had treated another human as a human and shown some respect for them.
One day I went to the Firestone to pick up Sophia's car. A mother with a little girl was coming out of the store. I opened the door and waited for the mother and her daughter come outside. The little girl came out the door and proceeded to go out into the parking lot. Mother did not like her getting away so she decided to stand in the doorway and yell at the little girl to get back up on top of the curb. She kept yelling at her daughter, daughter continued wandering around the parking lot and I stood there like a fool holding the door. Mom now was screaming but instead of going to get her daughter, turned around and started yelling at her husband that their daughter was not listening to her. I was still holding the door. Finally, when husband came to the door it was all cleared as the family all emptied out into the parking lot. I went inside, never acknowledged and glad to be away from such uncouth people.
When I returned to Lubbock, Texas recently, where I grew up, I would hold the door and would hear a "Thank You." I also had the door held open for me many times and I also gave a "Thank You." Now it was not because I expected these manners, but that I enjoyed people treating each other with respect and gentleness. I grew up with a belief that I should consider the feelings of others. Treat others as I would like to be treated. Is being nice to others, just to be thoughtful of the other person, a lost virtue?

Compliments

I bemoan the loss of the ability to compliment someone. I was raised to say "please" and "thank you", to greet people with a smile and a handshake, to compliment a person on how nice they looked or their selection of perfume and to leave a place nicer than how you found it. In society today such activity would put someone under suspect of ulterior motives. People don't shake hands but prefer to bump hands or not touch at all. It is safer not to say anything than be misconstrued by a comment taken the wrong way. I have a couple of friends that have lost weight and I won't say anything about it rather than be suspect of making a pass at them. It might be my own insecurities but have been in such situations and have seen others get in trouble for similar situations. My father's friends would ask me to shake their hands and would teach me how to give a good handshake. They said you could learn a lot about a person from how they shake your hand. I agree but find very few people return the gesture when I put out my hand to shake it. It is almost a social stutter on their part as they do not know how to react to someone offering this salutation.